August 29, 2005

Epistle to the world

WELL! (29/8/04)

Here's a thing, a surprise to myself and all who know me! As of now, I'm not drinking or smoking, they're just far too much trouble for their own good, and my only fear is that I'll turn into a really boring person (well, a more boring person!). With any luck I'm not chasing the non-drinking/non-smoking past, a fairytale that (as we all know) never really happened, ain't rosetinted spectacles a bitch!

Of course, what I'm REALLY hoping is that the lack of such intoxicants in my system will allow me to regain what prowess/inspiration I once had, both academically and physically. Last year, whippetlike physique, and (if I say so myself), CONSIDERABLE talent in writing rather beautiful things! First year of uni over, and both my brain and my belly reduced to useless jelly. NOT a great success.

So, albeit rather late, here come some new year's resolutions:

1. From this day forth (29/08/05), NO nicotine to enter the body of Alexander Charles Pichon (and if possible, no carbohydrate after 5pm.)
No more than 10 units of alcohol per week to be consumed, and these MUST not be consumed in less than TWO sessions.

2. A visual calendar of the length of time this endeavour lasts to be posted on the exterior of any bedchamber inhabited by Alexander Charles Pichon, for all to see. (Also included, current weight, to be taken once a week) This list also to be posted.

3. Alexander Pichon to practice his bass guitar for at least ONE HOUR per day, and take at least ONE HOUR'S cycling exercise every day.

4. During termtime, all of Alexander Pichon's essays to be completed at least THREE DAYS in advance of due date.

5. Alexander Pichon to wake up BEFORE 9am on weekdays, BEFORE 10.30am weekends.

6. Alexander Pichon to exercise brains every day, either through reading or writing for at least ONE HOUR. This may include writing e-mails, plays, blogs, online stories, reading coursebooks or ANY BOOK THAT HAS NOT BEEN READ BEFORE. Such books MAY NOT include magazines, but may include any newspaper not considered to be bollocks by anyone with an IQ of over 100.

7. Alexander Pichon's room is to be tidy, with no clothes/detritus on the floor. If it is not, it will be tidied until it is.

8. Once back at university, Alexander Pichon is to NOT BE SUCH A COWARD socially, and take chances and opportunities. If Alexander Pichon sees an extremely attractive girl, he is not just to complain to George about his lovelife (whilst george chats up said girl), he is to TAKE HIS CHANCES.



Well, number 8 seems rather illuminating, let's face it, the whole list is rather aimed towards increasing my attractiveness, which to be honest, a rather fair objective. Not that I don't take dying quite seriously of course, it's just to be honest, at this age I'm rather more concerned with finding a partner long term, than getting to 80. Although of course, when I DO procure a partner, I don't suppose I'll want to die young. Just goes to show that both are important.
Will keep you all posted on progress, wish me luck!


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