June 06, 2005

What to Expect On A Date With:

A CAUCASIAN WOMAN:
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
Third date: You get to have sex in the missionary
position. Then you promise to marry her but will probably abandon the idea.

ITALIAN WOMAN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive
restaurant
Second Date: You meet her parents and her mom makes
spaghetti & meatballs
Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3carat ring
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of
having sex
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend

JEWISH WOMAN:
First Date: You get a dynamite blowjob.
Second Date: You get another great blowjob.
Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head again.

MALAY WOMAN:
First date: You get to touch those big breasts of hers.
Second date: You get to home base with her.
Third date: You have to promise her that you are gonna get circumcised.
Then you will marry her and find out that you have to support her whole
family. The only consolation is that you get to repeat the procedure three
other times as allowed under Muslim law.

CHINESE WOMAN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happened.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner but nothing happens
again.
Third date: You don't even get to the third date and you have already
realized nothing is going to happen.

INDIAN WOMAN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.

BLACK WOMAN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date: Your get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive
dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She's pregnant

IRISH WOMAN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex

GREEK WOMAN:
First Date: You find out she's a chain smoker and heavy drinker, despite the
fact she's underage
Second date: You get her piss drunk and have sex
Third date: You find out she was a virgin and her dad and 30 uncles are
all out searching for you with a shot gun and a priest ready to perform the
wedding litergy.


- 2 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. I'm dating more Irish birds then

    06 Jun 2005, 11:44

  2. I guess I'm somewhere between Caucasian and Irish

    06 Jun 2005, 11:50


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