Okay, so in my article I was on my high-horse a little, as I, y’know, can be. And cocky as hell; I’ve been reading the newspaper far too often. How is it that comment sections, which come right after news of murders, environmental disasters, and political coups, are the cock-surest places on earth. Hell, Polly Toynbee must really have it sorted if she can understand, come to terms with, and explain all that to us plebs in 800 condescending words per week.
I realised for sure I was on to a loser when at 3am the day after I wrote this, my housemates made a late-night dash for Tescos to buy Cookie Crisp because their mothers gave it to them when they were little (yeah okay Freud...). Y’see, they bought it for its culture. Fair trade chocolate just doesn’t have that gooey-inside nostalgia going for it. The right purchase might just be more boring. Hmm, I’m dull and righteous. Coincidence?
I do stand by the whole armchair politics thing though. Example? A relative of mine voted for the most left-wing sounding party on the ballot paper cos they’re, like, radical. A few days later they were justifying an institution based on the fact that it had been there for a long time so it was, y’know, kinda a tradition. Apparently, the Conservative party (big ‘C’) is based on conservatism (small ‘c’), a philosophy based on the writings on Edmund Burke. Who’da thunk?
I’m only playing. I don’t dislike the right on principle. Sorry to everybody in the arts departments, I just can’t hate the Tories. I point-blank refuse to vote on the basis of who has the least waxy cheeks. I’m northern – my mummy told me they were bad, bad people too but that doesn’t count as a political opinion. I don’t judge German people based on what happened 70 years ago so I ain’t gonna vote for Labour purely because of its humble worker origins.
I’ve been working on a little theory (surprise, surprise). The whole general election philosophical-pint-wrangling bugged me to hell. Politics is historical. It’s like the old Greek riddle. If you change the name, the logo, the policies, the ideology, the core vote, the politicians, and all the members, is it the same party? No, it effing well isn’t. So I voted on the fact that it’s 2010 and there was a choice between three centre-right parties, one of which is authoritarian, one of which is tight with the bankers, and one of which is a bit wishy-washy. I took my pick out of these real parties, not the Ghost of Socialist Past or how much I have a chip on my shoulder about Thatcher.
And gees, you Lib Dem people, it’s a political party, not a lobby group. I’m a paid-up member and all too (sorry about that) but if you want Clegg & Co to stay pure, grass-roots, and holier-than-thou then they may as well pack up politics and pitch a tent beside Liberty. Haven’t you seen The Wire? Politics is compromise, compromise, compromise, and being shit on. Except more articulately.