July 25, 2005

Holidays, shmolidays

Ahhh the Summer holidays years ago, close approaching an eon ago.
This was the time of kicking back, going to Steam Rallys, visiting Grandparents, and going to Oakwood in return for spending hours if not days pulling up fern.

Now the Summer holidays just mean toil, tosspots, trashed and tourists – some fateful days all combined!

Each day is pretty much the same as the past, next and other.

Is it too much to ask for a little diversity, something along the lines of
Streakers in the maze
Fit builders to oggle at (now that I've discovered I have an oggle face -damn you Shall, I was happy!)
Hector (the old lesbian couples huge feck of dog) to maul a Brownie to death
Tom snapping, flip out like a ninja at the stupid general public
The butterflies to start of mass attack on the old people in the zoo

Ahh well, day off tomorrow Rich and I are off on one of our holiday japes.


July 18, 2005

So what now then….

Iím at a loss, I really am, this Saturday something was ripped from my life and itís going to be a long wait till I can have that feeling back.

The ever continuing speculation, the questioning, the concocting of possible scenarios, the shoulds, the woulds the could bes!
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince was released!

I abandoned several thrilling MSN conversations, sped towards the WHSmith in Monmouth, dealt with stupid drunk Monmouth people, like an idiot read it until my contact lenses said ďNo more fool itís 2am, work in the morningĒ.

8am rising time, in true cheeky Dave style I get in a cheeky hours pre-work read, now on chapter 13, enjoying book, go to work, have to endure 8hrs of the stupid general public when I could nay should be finishing the book.
Return home, feed, water, bathe, read, fall asleep by accident, wake, fuelled with sugar and an urge to complete the book I start once more to read, I dispair at the characters, I wince, I get more and more intrigued and all of a sudden Iím blubbing like a baby, finish book, the fear sets in.

What now….?
No longer can I justify listening to Harry Potter audio books all day and night as preparation for the next book, my desktop has to be changed (no more countdown to Half-Blood Prince), no interesting fact for the day for me to scoff at. All very upsetting
I have to find something different to fall asleep to (American Dad so far) instead of Stephen Fry or the inferior Jim Dale (Order of the Phoenix)

On a smug self- satisfied level I was right about who the Half-blood Prince was, Iím not going to say what else because I have no intention of ruining it for anyone else.
So read faster you gits I need to discuss my theories!!

In short, I liked this book very much, not a great deal of stuff happens in it, but was does is a great deal.
It's a bit long winded at the start and being a bit of a Potter freak I could see where most Voldemort history sessions were taking us, but a good warm up for the next and final installation of Harry Potter.

I'm now stuck with out anything but working in my life, I'm being a good girl so the usual holiday fun aint happening (I blame Claire, Chris and Giles disapproving looks for this), and then too poor to be having any other fun, so what is a country girl to do?


July 08, 2005

Looking for something to do?

Hello Everyone and more accurately those who are reading this

Come to Wales,

I can promise you tip top hospitality in the beautiful Wye Valley (Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty and Site of Special Scientific Interest).
With many opportunities to get drunk, go for walks, meet strange Taffs, see things you just can't in England (possibly in the Lake District but they are special there)

Also bargin admission to my places of work

If that's not enough, how about a beverage with these lovelies

Shall We're going to the beach this week, so bring your flip flops (spades and sand will be provided), also mum says "You can be adopted if you want, you'd be a happy addition to Clan Lerwyn


June 24, 2005

Man, we're sooo Baarmy!

Oh sweet mother of pearl, what the hell is going on with the world?

I think this link is just a cheap excuse to create Welsh niche porn.

It is set to become the must-have accessory for hill walkers, shepherds and farmers everywhere Ė a sheep ringtone!

Oh fantastic, yes there is nothing a farmer enjoys more than sheep freakin' bleating!

When does a sheep farmer turn into a shepherd and vice versa.


June 20, 2005

Where'd you go?

Seriously this is insane and one of the reasons why people should not do hardcore drugs.

It'll bodge up your brain, internal organs and most importantly your boobs! Cocaine is baaaaaaaaad!

Where the hell has the girl that automatically caused the "boooooob" reaction gone?

She used to be really hot (almost a Rachel Stevens, not quite, but I still would have).
But now she just looks like a coke whore, who whilst vomiting her meagre diet into a toilet caused a bottle of flash to fall on her bonce.
For goodness ever sake this girl is still 18!
Gah, itís freakiní vile, look at her arms let alone the thingy sheís hanging around with, good grief eat some food!

Could this possibly be a reaction to the medias obsession with the fact that she wasn't a skinny git? Or is it infact her attempt to join the spindle wars?
Shall and Chris what trend setters you are, unfortunately the originals you may be but the spindlest crown no longer is yours!

Although thinking about it a little more if we all got this thin Halloween Parties would be everso easy to dress up for. Although how many Skeletors or Mummys can you get away with at a party?
Also who needs a toothpick when you have a finger?


The Next Big Hit


So the ultimate in job swap TV loveliness

Rik Stein and Ray Mears, I really don't see why no-one has thought about this before. But here is my suggestion to Endemol

Give Ray a coconut, some bamboo and let him whittle his way to a Michelin Star restuarant. Whilst Rik can be dropped off in the Amazon live with the native seeing if they can tell the difference between Tesco mushrooms with organic rainforest muchrooms.

To keep the public properly happy, there would be a BBCi sweepstake on the length of time it takes for either or both to die/ have a mental breakdown.


June 14, 2005

The Taste of a Party


Kinda risky blogging this, but then again if you come and have fun that'll be ace (bring alcohol)

But yes, Good Taste Bad Taste is the name of the game.

And yes to those who can't be arsed to make an effort come in normal clothes and pretend to be a part of the beige movement or something equally lame.

For my part I will be attending as Myra Hindley (basically what I look like after Thursday anyway).

It's going to be freakin' turboly awesome, if you enjoyed the Ninja Party you'll love Friday.

P.S
This Friday as in the 17th not the 18th

P.P.S
If you're easily offended come and we'll watch you explode


My PoA

Tomorrow is what should be my Graduating Final Fling, but due to me fupping up it is likely to be my final Final Fling anyway, so Iím going to enjoy it to the max!

So in true procrastinator fashion here is my PoA for the Fling couple of days

15.06.05
06.00 – Wake up and revise a bit more
07.45 – Drive to campus
09:30 – Sit exam
10:30 – Leave exam hall
11:00 – Start EPP revision
13:30 – Meet Emily for lunch
14:30 – Return to the RLS
16:00 – Ready to go back to campus (no big gown for me)
17:15 – Leave Campus for Fling action
20:00 – Stop drinking after dinner (as if that's going to happen)

16.06.05
00:00 – Start to hallucinate again
01:45 – Give up on blokes
03:00 – Return to RLS
04:00 – Drink copious amounts of coffee
04:30 – Start revision
08:00 – Bus to campus
10:30 – End exams for hopefully won't be the last time
10:35 – Start drinking
11:00 Ė Die
17:00 Ė Come back to life and go to Compact Disco

Please feel free to come and keep me company on Thursday, or at least make sure wolves and magpies donít tear me apart/ peck my eyes out


Jooped by my exam


Medical Virology one of the more interesting modules I'm resiting this year, is now over, woo yay!.

I will have fond memories of this exam, is this because I knew all the answers and breezed through it like a fart through demin? Was it due to the exam being at a sensible time of the day? The answer to both of those is I wish that were the case .

The exam wasn't as bad as it could have been, considering the vast majority of my revision was me giggling at the diseased willys or last nights/this mornings hallucination session – my the sleepy mind does weird ass things!

But the reason I enjoyed this exam was that whenever I was starting to go Gahh, why won't you recall the information brain I got a lovely waft of Joop.

I don't know what it is about Joop, and Lynx Africa, but they do funny things to me. I was sitting in the Butterworth Hall my mind a bevy of virology know how and the sole thought travelling through my brain was mmmmm, mmmmm, man, sexy, smell mmmmm, mmmmm .

So I would like to thank the undoubtedly fit guy who was wearing Joop this morning, thank you, you have brought me back from the brink of insanity, you and your lust inducing smell.

Now looking forward to men in suits smelling fit tomorrow!


June 12, 2005

Sun Screen, it won't make you thin but it might keep you alive


Ladies, Gentlemen and those who are undecided, as the summer approaches (is it here yet, oh I don't know, the 21st of March means something I think, but pish).

As the summer approaches no doubt our TVs will be bombarded with pretty slim young things having fun japes on sunkissed beaches, being protected from the evil rays by some sun screen or other.

Lets get a few things straight about these marvellous sun stoppers:
1) You should wear a bit of sun screen all year round
2) The lotion will only protect you from a percentage of the sunbeams on your lovely bodies
3) You need to reapply during the day
4) Always put on some moisturiser after being out in the sun

These products will not:
1) Turn you into the pretty people on the adverts, if you are a fatty now you'll be a fatty with the sun screen on
2) Make it perfectly ok for you to go and lie out in the sun all day long (cancer is a git people!!)
3) Protect you anymore due to being discovered in some pretentious lab in France

Anyway the only reason you should use sun screen is stop this sort of thing happening to you!


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