All entries for Saturday 16 October 2004

Today's second guest blogger: Tim Westwood

" 'Sup, dawg?

Now I know that a lot of you'll be maxin' out for my big jam at the Union this Friday, knwhmsayin'? And I know that a lot of you'll probably be wantin' some love from the G-man Westwood, knwhmsayin'? Well that's cool, homez, and I can dig it. I'll be droppin' bombs so big they'll make Hiroshima look like a primary school fireworks display! And lemme tell you bro, I been to a fair few o' them in my time.

But just remember what my old man the late Bishop of Peterborough used to tell me while preachin' to his hood down in the home counties: check yo'self, don't wreck yo'self. Three pints is more than enough for a good time, knwhmsayin'? Jus' be cool, bro. And ladies – I'm down with givin' you some of the Westwood love, but only if you get screened for hidden weapons first, knwhmsayin'? Cuz last time there was this like proper gangsta chick with a well-safe rack who whipped out an Uzi as soon as we got past first-base and into the car-park… That shit was wack, bruv, and totally off the hook.

Anyway, I wanna big-up all my people in the Westwood Halls, especially those comin' straight outta Compton. Bang your doors! But not after midnight obviously, cuz that might get you capped by the Warden, and that shit ain't cricket.

Keep it real. Unless you're readin' this through a Virtual Reality helmet, in which case keep it… y'know… simulated".

[Editor's note: the jumper modelled by Tim in the above photo is available now from all good Matalan stores].

: 16 Oct 2004 18:24 |  Tags: Inane Drivel |  Comments (4) |  Close comments |  Report a problem

Today's guest blogger: Craig David

"Hmmyeeeeeah…

Met her on a Monday, shagged her on a Tuesday, I'm Craig David!

Siphilis on the Wednesday, mind – with hindsight, probably should've worn a sheath".

: 16 Oct 2004 16:23 |  Tags: Inane Drivel |  Comments (8) |  Close comments |  Report a problem