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Student in Film & Television Studies? Not fucking likely…

Having graduated with about as much honour as Prince Harry at the Auschwitz remembrance ceremonies, you may now recognise me as the less-gay half of Carter & Tarbs, the pair of twats responsible for tunifying your drunken memories at Top Banana every Monday.

Failing that, I probably insulted you at some point during Crash last year. But then no doubt you were slinging abuse my way at the time.

Like a cheap slag, I’m very much up for hire. For all your DJ-ing needs (or if you’re simply one of the elite who abuses my number to text in Top B requests), contact the following…

Mobile: 07833 610576